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Whack-A-Muse: Half-assed

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Willing to take punches. Monday, January 28, 2013. Ugh I'm in no mood to do this today. But I made a promise to myself that I would, so here goes. Crickets are all that come to mind. I don't feel good, and I'm never going to be the kind of person who fakes it. This sickness-riddled rambling is all I have to give today. Next Monday, when this system has moved out of my body, I promise something less half-assed. I can't wait to be a full ass again. Subscribe to: Post Comments (Atom). The Art of Living.

Whack-A-Muse: The Art of Living

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Willing to take punches. Monday, January 7, 2013. The Art of Living. Nothing- not Anne Heche's. Interview with Barbara Walters; not being stuck in an elevator with a fat man while I'm holding a sandwich; not even Michele Bachmann living in the White House- scares me more than dying. What if To Kill A Mockingbird. Or The Night Circus. Had been written after 2173 and I never cracked their stiff spines only to soften them in a matter of days? Subscribe to: Post Comments (Atom). View my complete profile.

Whack-A-Muse: c.u.n.n.i.l.i.n.g.u.s.

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Willing to take punches. Monday, December 24, 2012. Cunnil.i.n.g.u.s. All right. I've heard enough. There are too many men in too many movies claiming the key to performing fellatio on women is spelling out letters with their tongues. Most recently, I watched a woman tell her boyfriend he's really good at it and he says it's because he wrote a short story. With his tongue. What a fantastical way to admit he has no fucking idea what he's doing. Subscribe to: Post Comments (Atom). A writer, sarcastic in na...

Whack-A-Muse: Dick Licker of the Year

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Willing to take punches. Monday, December 31, 2012. Dick Licker of the Year. Competition was fierce this year, but edging out Newt Gingrich. Boy Scouts of America. Octomom, Carnival Cruise Line. And Justice Anthony Scalia. For the Dick Licker of the Year award was the Iowa Supreme Court. What happened to holding people personally accountable for their thoughts and feelings? If we set a precedent to blame others- how can we possibly be expected to control ourselves. You and your wife! And you, Iowa Suprem...

Whack-A-Muse: Here We Go Again

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Willing to take punches. Monday, December 10, 2012. Here We Go Again. Every time it hurts me. Every time I feel like throwing a monstrous fit. Every time I wish for change. I recently conducted a medical review over the phone. Perfectly Pleasant Pam asked me my name. Date of birth. Single or married. Oh, boy. Here we go. I sighed. "I guess I have to say single, unfortunately.". Well that's all right," Pam said. I imagined her shifting uncomfortably in her seat. I thought Pam and I were done; we'd had our...