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grif.fi

grif.fi/n | documenting this thing, whatever it is

http://grif.fi/n/page/2

Under this broken roof. Jennifer and I have tickets to see Pearl Jam in concert here in Ottawa this evening. They are the only ‘big’ band (whatever that means) that I have followed for decades (I am old) but somehow not seen live, so it seems like this is something that’s way overdue. Http:/ grif.fi/n/wp-content/uploads/12-Come-Back.mp3. I hope that one doesn’t make the set list. The pool is open, now, but Griffin is not here to go in there with me. As I mentioned in my last post. We held a wonderful bir...

grif.fi

grif.fi/n | 12

http://grif.fi/n/2016/03

Today is Griffin’s birthday, a logical – hopefully – end point to this most recent trying time, this culmination of repeated blows to the head and heart. As I mentioned in my last post. We held a wonderful birthday party on the weekend, a whirlwind as always, a reminder that our tribe has our back, our families are there for us, our friends won’t forget, and those who worked professionally with Griffin kind of liked us, too. These are good relationships. People who show up are good. It was a genuine hono...

grif.fi

grif.fi/n | one year

http://grif.fi/n/category/uncategorized

I started drinking coffee in 2006 with the hopes of finding a way to not nod off in the CHEO waiting room three mornings a week. It didn’t seem appropriate to be randomly falling asleep in public at the children’s hospital – I needed to do something, anything, to maintain the facade, to not let anyone know how parenting this severely disabled little kid was thoroughly kicking my ass. Hey, I think I recognize that lady… a nurse from somewhere? Can it be that my son has been gone for a year already? How to...

grif.fi

grif.fi/n | one year

http://grif.fi/n/one-year

I started drinking coffee in 2006 with the hopes of finding a way to not nod off in the CHEO waiting room three mornings a week. It didn’t seem appropriate to be randomly falling asleep in public at the children’s hospital – I needed to do something, anything, to maintain the facade, to not let anyone know how parenting this severely disabled little kid was thoroughly kicking my ass. Hey, I think I recognize that lady… a nurse from somewhere? Can it be that my son has been gone for a year already? How to...

grif.fi

grif.fi/n | waxing

http://grif.fi/n/2016/01

I think of him all the time, of course, so I don’t really need that full moon to remind me every twenty nine (and a bit) days of Griffin’s life, and death. I used to like gazing up into the sky for a bit on a clear night, but I find that I like it less, now. It is entirely believable that he has been gone for two full months. It is very difficult to accept that he’s never coming back. Golden words in a broken voice. To find out what was there, and he asked me what I do for a living, as adults do. I t...

grif.fi

grif.fi/n | present tense

http://grif.fi/n/present-tense

So it was not especially strange to not have him here with me to celebrate this past weekend, but strange is still a good word to use to describe the day-to-day. I realize that they were keeping me focused on the task at hand, almost as much as Griffin was, himself. Suffice to say, I will be glad when group is over. Yes, Dan Walker. Send to Email Address. Post was not sent - check your email addresses! Email check failed, please try again. Sorry, your blog cannot share posts by email.

grif.fi

grif.fi/n | time is slipping

http://grif.fi/n/2015/12

After all of that, everyone went home, and we were left with the same house, the same names, most of the same people, and something entirely different to live with. People ask how things are, because that’s what people do, and I don’t have much to tell them. It must be quiet around your place now, they say. I still have two sorta-little kids, so, actually, no, not really! What do I do with my time? My first dose of this grief was in Loblaws at South Keys, taking a shortcut through the Joe Fresh departmen...

grif.fi

grif.fi/n | summer is forever changes

http://grif.fi/n/2016/08

Summer is forever changes. One year ago today we packed the kids into the van and set off on our Make A Wish. Trip with Griff at Chateau Montebello. Would the hospital bed Griffin required and promised to us actually be there and be appropriate for his needs? Could a beautiful old hotel in the middle of nowhere really be as accessible as we needed it to be to get around and do everything, together, as we’d hoped? It seemed unlikely. But it turned out to be a great week. Fall fell and Griffin died. In Mon...

grif.fi

grif.fi/n | one year

http://grif.fi/n/author/dandanwalker-ca

I started drinking coffee in 2006 with the hopes of finding a way to not nod off in the CHEO waiting room three mornings a week. It didn’t seem appropriate to be randomly falling asleep in public at the children’s hospital – I needed to do something, anything, to maintain the facade, to not let anyone know how parenting this severely disabled little kid was thoroughly kicking my ass. Hey, I think I recognize that lady… a nurse from somewhere? Can it be that my son has been gone for a year already? How to...