abeautifultattoo.blogspot.com
Beautiful Tattoo: Confessions of a Former Good Girl: I Only Do What I Feel Like Doing
http://abeautifultattoo.blogspot.com/2015/08/confessions-of-former-good-girl-i-only.html
Thursday, August 6, 2015. Confessions of a Former Good Girl: I Only Do What I Feel Like Doing. Ever since my Lyme diagnosis, I've been on a slow journey of relearning how to be a person—a person who is healthy both physically and emotionally. One thing I'm seeing ever more clearly: I can't possibly live with strength and enjoyment if I'm constantly forcing myself past the boundaries of fatigue and pain. When my body is sick or tired, the only. What if on some days I lie around for no good reason, or go s...
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Beautiful Tattoo: March 2015
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Monday, March 16, 2015. I had a hair appointment on Thursday morning last week, because two weeks before I quit my job to launch into free-lance editing and writing, and now I work at home and can run errands in the middle of a weekday. I sat alone in the waiting area as my stylist finished with his client and I listened to the salon chatter and the pop music playing. I felt peaceful, until I saw a headline on an old People. And He's going to whack my ear with his fingers; he always does. I take a stab a...
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Beautiful Tattoo: Meditation on a Diagnosis (Part 7)
http://abeautifultattoo.blogspot.com/2014/12/meditation-on-diagnosis-part-7.html
Tuesday, December 16, 2014. Meditation on a Diagnosis (Part 7). I had dreamed of rescue: a magical, finger-snap cure. My life would go back to the way it was before I became sick, and I'd even gain all I'd missed out on due to illness. But there is no rescue until you rescue yourself. And if you could. Return to the way things were before, you'd find all your illusions stripped away. Subscribe to: Post Comments (Atom). But I, being poor, have only my dreams. Meditation on a Diagnosis (Part 7). Meditation...
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Beautiful Tattoo: Meditation on a Diagnosis (Part 6)
http://abeautifultattoo.blogspot.com/2014/12/meditation-on-diagnosis-part-6.html
Sunday, December 14, 2014. Meditation on a Diagnosis (Part 6). We embrace dysfunction rather than face truths we fear will destroy us. Deep within, I had always believed that if I got sick enough, or suffered an injury bad enough, the people in my world would help me. Am I really worth caring for . . . When I am not doing my chores or helping look after my siblings? When I am not happy? When I am too pretty or not pretty enough? No The answer was always no. But now, transfixed by physical and emotional w...
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Beautiful Tattoo: November 2014
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Sunday, November 16, 2014. Remembering is a large part of recovery: trekking through the past, often with the aid of a therapist, to identify moments of trauma or significance and integrate those moments with the present. We all deal with our memories differently and in my case, much of my experience in the past four years has been frustration, shame, and fear about what I cannot. Gradually, I'm learning to apply this principle to my memories. I'm gaining a sense that simply acknowledging and making ...
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Beautiful Tattoo: May 2015
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Sunday, May 10, 2015. Toward evening with the inevitable dimunition of nervous energy,. Tender Is the Night. Bk 3, ch. vii. Subscribe to: Posts (Atom). But I, being poor, have only my dreams. Toward evening with the inevitable dimunition of . View my complete profile. Watermark template. Powered by Blogger.
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Beautiful Tattoo: Confessions of a Former Good Girl: I Attend Church Infrequently
http://abeautifultattoo.blogspot.com/2015/07/confessions-of-former-good-girl-i.html
Sunday, July 12, 2015. Confessions of a Former Good Girl: I Attend Church Infrequently. I was a Christian demanded faithful church attendance and involvement. Was I allowed to reallocate my limited energy from church to social activities or relaxation? Voices from my past kept whispering to me that if I would just go to church, I'd find that I had all the other things I needed—health, friends. Put God first, and the rest will follow. Only, it had never worked out that way before. View my complete profile.
abeautifultattoo.blogspot.com
Beautiful Tattoo: "Toward evening with the inevitable dimunition of nervous energy,
http://abeautifultattoo.blogspot.com/2015/05/toward-evening-with-inevitable.html
Sunday, May 10, 2015. Toward evening with the inevitable dimunition of nervous energy,. Tender Is the Night. Bk 3, ch. vii. Subscribe to: Post Comments (Atom). But I, being poor, have only my dreams. Toward evening with the inevitable dimunition of . View my complete profile. Watermark template. Powered by Blogger.
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Beautiful Tattoo: June 2014
http://abeautifultattoo.blogspot.com/2014_06_01_archive.html
Thursday, June 12, 2014. The Other Side of the Story. I have trouble knowing what's true about myself. I have trouble telling my story. I've heard my story told to me by relatives, who learned "my" story from my parents, who tell me my story wordlessly, accusingly, even from far away. She was a good daughter who suddenly turned against us, we don't know why. She's cut off everyone. We are so bewildered. The real story slips away from me. I'm too afraid to tell it. I am ashamed of it. It sounds like this.
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Beautiful Tattoo: December 2014
http://abeautifultattoo.blogspot.com/2014_12_01_archive.html
Tuesday, December 16, 2014. Meditation on a Diagnosis (Part 7). I had dreamed of rescue: a magical, finger-snap cure. My life would go back to the way it was before I became sick, and I'd even gain all I'd missed out on due to illness. But there is no rescue until you rescue yourself. And if you could. Return to the way things were before, you'd find all your illusions stripped away. Sunday, December 14, 2014. Meditation on a Diagnosis (Part 6). Deep within, I had always believed that if I got sick enoug...
