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Deluxe Mixed Nuts: January 2012
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With Apologies To Actual Writers. Reporting, Recording and Relaying - But Always Telling It As I See It. Sunday, January 29, 2012. A Cryptic Phone Call, a High Speed Dash and a Question That Will Never Be Answered. There are times of the day when a phone call from your parents illicit little more than some chat time with mom. Eight forty-five Saturday morning is not one of those times. This can’t be good. 8220;Hello,” I said. My dad was on the other end. “You up yet or are you still sleeping? I am almost...
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Deluxe Mixed Nuts: February 2012
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With Apologies To Actual Writers. Reporting, Recording and Relaying - But Always Telling It As I See It. Monday, February 27, 2012. Riding On Trains With Old People. 2:30PM – We board the train without being asked for any ID and without one bag getting searched. Zero, and I mean Z-E-R-O security on the rails – just sayin’. 2:50 – The old lady down the car leans her head out of her room and asks me if they have started serving the free wine and cheese yet. 6:15 – I am back in the lounge car drinking...
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Deluxe Mixed Nuts: November 2012
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With Apologies To Actual Writers. Reporting, Recording and Relaying - But Always Telling It As I See It. Wednesday, November 14, 2012. I Act In A Commercial - And Of Course Kill It. I know many of you have been wondering, “How is Dave’s acting career going? 8221; Well, let me tell – it is incredible. Coming off my killer performance in The Slaughter Of Good Ole Richie. You’re probably thinking, “Wait, isn’t doing a commercial after a film a step back? Will he be sober? Scene 1 – I was directed to s...
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Deluxe Mixed Nuts: March 2012
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With Apologies To Actual Writers. Reporting, Recording and Relaying - But Always Telling It As I See It. Tuesday, March 13, 2012. My Friend Mark Went To India. I Interviewed Him. I talked to my good friend Mark about his recent trip to India. Included are references to; elephants, class warfare, having your “junk grabbed,” and the Beatles. Enjoy. Mark, in red. Photo (I think) used by permission. One of your pictures shows you and your group sharing an elaborate dinner. Did it bother you at all that m...
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Deluxe Mixed Nuts: The War On Christmas (Gift Exchange With Random People In Our Lives)
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With Apologies To Actual Writers. Reporting, Recording and Relaying - But Always Telling It As I See It. Friday, December 28, 2012. The War On Christmas (Gift Exchange With Random People In Our Lives). Is there any way we can cease and desist on the Christmas gifts we purchase for the ancillary yet important people in our lives? Does the neighbor up the street really need a pound of organic coffee? Does your friend’s son really need an iTunes gift card? I came to this exact conclusion several years ago&#...
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Deluxe Mixed Nuts: Go For The Coffee, Stay For The Lobotomy
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With Apologies To Actual Writers. Reporting, Recording and Relaying - But Always Telling It As I See It. Thursday, April 4, 2013. Go For The Coffee, Stay For The Lobotomy. Earlier today, I was either the unwilling participant in a sociological experiment or the accidental victim of a voodoo mind trick. Either way, it’s the last thing you would expect when simply buying a coffee. Today, I was standing in line with my small coffee and (since it was a gym day and I refuse to pay $50 for a protein drink) cho...
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Deluxe Mixed Nuts: August 2012
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With Apologies To Actual Writers. Reporting, Recording and Relaying - But Always Telling It As I See It. Friday, August 10, 2012. Where Dave Uncovers A Conspiracy To Overthrow The World From The Front Seat Of His Car. I’m in my car in the parking lot of Home Depot, George Harrison on the radio, and I'm staring at the back of a package of Mylar numbers, considering that a strange little accident may have led to me uncovering a hidden agenda with the potential for world domination. But back to me sitting i...
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Deluxe Mixed Nuts: September 2012
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With Apologies To Actual Writers. Reporting, Recording and Relaying - But Always Telling It As I See It. Thursday, September 27, 2012. The Murky Socio-Economics Of School Pictures. This is Sally, before her parents ruined her. Well, we are going to get your school pictures retouched! Finally, a picture that won’t be embarrassing! 8221; If you think your child won’t be bringing that up in therapy in a few years you are mistaken. We settled on the “Value” package which means one of the grandpar...The pictu...
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Deluxe Mixed Nuts: The Murky Socio-Economics Of School Pictures
http://deluxemixednuts.blogspot.com/2012/09/the-murky-socio-economics-of-school.html
With Apologies To Actual Writers. Reporting, Recording and Relaying - But Always Telling It As I See It. Thursday, September 27, 2012. The Murky Socio-Economics Of School Pictures. This is Sally, before her parents ruined her. Well, we are going to get your school pictures retouched! Finally, a picture that won’t be embarrassing! 8221; If you think your child won’t be bringing that up in therapy in a few years you are mistaken. We settled on the “Value” package which means one of the grandpar...The pictu...