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Lady V: May 2007
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He who desires but acts not, breeds pestilence. A cheery little quote from Blake at the start of a cheery little novel, just sent to the agent. All God's Children: 93,000 words on unrequited lesbian love, war, religion, sex and terminal illness. Plus a few dead babies thrown in for good measure. It can't help but be a bestseller, surely? I have 35,000 words spare in case it needs to be longer. Film rights available. I shall require careful handling in the next few weeks. Posted by Lady V at 5:20 pm.
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Lady V: January 2007
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Last night, a trip to Sadlers Wells to see Mathew Bourne’s version of Swan Lake, the one in which the swans are played by hot semi-naked men instead of anorexic chicks in tutus. I am no expert on ballet so will spare you any critique, apart from to say it was stunning and moving and made me cry. Soon after that, I started smoking fags and reading books by Sylvia Plath. I listened to The Smiths a lot and bleached my hair. I decided that an artform that was dependent on grace was probably not the b...The s...
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Lady V: November 2006
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Saturday morning. My father calls. Dad (cheerily): Hello love! I just wanted to tell you that I’ve worked out that you’re exactly a third of a century old today. Thirty-three-and-a-third-years-old. That’s thirty-three years and a hundred and twenty two days. Dad: And I thought that was interesting because. Me: Dad, please don’t start talking about Jesus again. Dad: And so you should feel quite jolly. Compared to him you’re doing rather well. I thought you might like to hear that. Links to this post.
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Lady V: June 2007
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So, sitting at my window with the baby gurgling contentedly on my lap I check my emails. I see one from the agent. I convince myself that because she emailed not called it's a no. I decide not to open it. Tears drop onto baby Bruno's head. He turns around and gives me a puzzled look. Your aunt is a failure. What? V: Oh bugger it, I'll look then. I open the email. She's read the first 100 pages. She likes it. She wants to meet. 430 next Wednesday in Soho. Posted by Lady V at 10:30 am. Links to this post.
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Lady V: October 2006
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The object of my affections. Born Tuesday 24th October at 4am. I have fallen hopelessly in love. Posted by Lady V at 1:11 pm. Links to this post. Ani Yoda'at Rak Milim Achadot. Autumn. The traditional time of year for, errr, night classes and new linguistic challenges. No namby pamby Latinate languages for me. I want something hardcore with a different script. God forbid that I should take the easy way out. And we all know the best way to learn a language. That’s right. Sleep with the natives. Me: Exactl...
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Lady V: December 2006
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Le geek, c’est chic. The British Library, my spiritual home. The only club in London that will have me as a member. A place where I am surrounded by people who understand the absolute necessity of having the same locker (410) and the same seat (3226) each day in order to concentrate. Where they have gauged the tastes of their clientele so well that the cafe provides both organic tofu sandwiches and spotted dick with custard. Where the noticeboard contains messages such as the one that I saw today:. I sas...
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Lady V: September 2006
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Hence last night's turbation. Posted by Lady V at 10:57 am. Links to this post. A salutary lesson on the perils of believing in one's own mediocrity. Posted by Lady V at 10:52 am. Links to this post. Create your own visited countries map. Posted by Lady V at 3:17 am. Links to this post. I can't bear it. It is a travesty of justice. That's all I am saying. Yeah. Totty fucking totty. Posted by Lady V at 3:04 am. Links to this post. Mens sana in corpore sano. 3 hours reading Vogue at the Royal Free Hospital...
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Lady V: February 2007
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I've spent the day driving a white van. I've got no carpets left. I've been dancing to Edith. Posted by Lady V at 1:21 am. Links to this post. V dynasty update II. And whilst we’re on the subject of nudity, Bruno Sebastian, now three months old and on his first trip to the fleshpots of London. It was all going marvellously until he pissed on my head, which led to stern words from his Aunt V and is perhaps why he’s looking slightly scared. Posted by Lady V at 11:19 pm. Links to this post. I hear you ask.
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Lady V: April 2007
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The road to self improvement. Mindful of a recent drunken promise made as the night train rumbled its way across Europe, and uncomfortably aware that, despite having spent almost two months of last year in Italy my vocabulary is still limited to swearing, various sexual practices, parts of the anatomy and a range of food items, I have taken the plunge. By then I intend to be reading Dante in the original and chatting up raven-haired beauties in backstreet bars. Oh yes. Or rather, si. Links to this post.